Predict a cricket headline for 2014

[Arthur Crabtree]

Broad and Prior given Australian Order of Mateship.

[Arthur Crabtree]

Charles dies before the restoration and never does become King

Charles invades England from his province in Normandy, but Pietersen's archers repel him and drive him back into the sea. Those in bed consider themselves acursed.

[Durhamfootman]

Pomnishambles admitted into the Oxford English Dictionary, as word of the year for 2014

Pronunciation: /?p?mn??amb(?)lz/

noun
Zimbabwean informal
a situation that has been comprehensively mismanaged, characterized by a string of blunders, miscalculations and recriminations:
anyone with five minutes to spare, a Grey Nichols bat, and a quick word with Colly, could
have averted the entire pomnishambles by analysing Flowers decsion making processes

Origin: early 21st century: from pomni- + shambles, first used in the Anglo-Australian satirical television series The Ashes 2013/14

[GarlicJam]

Broad and Prior given Australian Order of Mateship.

Which is a double edged sword for them and all Englanders.

Little do they realise that it is the lowest of all the Australian Awards, a necessary precursor to applying for Australian Citizenship - but does not guarrantee one.

[Arthur Crabtree]

Broad and Prior promised a fair go.

[Arthur Crabtree]

Nice one Durham!

[GarlicJam]

Broad dominates England in his first series for his newly adopted country (The Republic of Australia) during the 2017-8 Ashes.

A record 47 wickets for the series is highlighted by an impressive 17 wickets and 115 runs at his new home ground, The Gabba. 45,000 adoring fans confer the Blessing of the Q'Billies upon him. The Courier Mail calls for him to be given The Cobbership of Godzone in the Strayla Day Awards.

[GarlicJam]

Prior goes on to star for the Upper Mooroolbark West Thirds.

[Arthur Crabtree]

A happy ending.

[Durhamfootman]

Prior attempts to australianise himself by keeping all the OO's that he saves by sayin G'day and inserting them into his name.

Matt Poorioorooologong becomes an immediate hit with the fanatics

[GarlicJam]

Prior attempts to australianise himself by keeping all the OO's that he saves by sayin G'day and inserting them into his name.

Matt Poorioorooologong becomes an immediate hit with the fanatics

[Alviro Patterson]

The Home Office sends a van round to KP's house with 'Pietersen go home' on the side with a phone number and an offer to pay his fare.

The Footman facing serious competition for PAH2014 awards

[andy]

ECB finally kick KP out of the england side

[KipperJohn]

Andy Flower and Kevin Pietersen vie for the lead role in a remake of 'The Untouchables'.

[Aidan11]

Flower & KP release a cover version of Cliff Richard's "We Don't Talk Anymore".